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#OrnamentoftheDay: glass Santa. A wedding present from my Aunt Cindy.
YAY IT’S TIME TO LISTEN TO CHRISTMAS MUSIC AT WORK! CHRISTMAS MUSIC THAT I PICKED OUT AND IS NOT A MUZAK STATION! YAAAAAAAAY!!!
Mystery Science Theater 3000 5x21 “Santa Claus”
Board book humor, amirite?!
Made me straight-up laugh.
There are approximately 6 million “Easy Updo” tutorials on the internet (give or take) purporting to teach the secret to doing a twisted chignon with a braided headband in 5 minutes or less (the secret is having 4 hands, eyes on the back of your head, and a degree from cosmetology school). What all of these tutorials neglect to mention is that they only apply to girls with goldilocks hair: not too thin, not too thick, just right. Must be nice. I happen to have thick hair. Like, really fucking thick. Like, takes 6 hours to air-dry thick. And all of those instructional posts and videos feel like a damn lie to me. Even the ones that explicitly say they are for thick hair are bullshit. Have you ever tried to do milkmaid braids on hair that weighs 10 pounds while dry? Clearly not, so check your thin hair privilege. This is a tutorial for super hella thick haired ladies who know the struggle. (Note: this tutorial also applies to ladies who are lazy or completely inept in the ways of hairstyling)
What you will need:
- hair tie
These are the boops heard around the world.
Their intelligence. Elephants understand that ivory is the reason they’re being killed. There are very, very few big bulls with big ivory left in the world, and the two or three still in Tsavo have become nocturnal. I’ve seen a bull with big tusks by the road turn his back, trying to hide the ivory.
What’s the biggest misconception people have about elephants?
Daphne Sheldrick, interview in TIME Magazine, June 4, 2012
This breaks my heart.
Polar climates are a preservationist’s dream: with sub freezing year round temperatures, Robert Falcon Scott’s 1911 hut has remained exactly as he left it when he set out on his doomed race to the South Pole, never to return again. The kitchen shelves are lined with tins of haddock, mustard, anchovies and preserved rhubarb chunks (“A little lemon peel is an improvement” advises the label). The bunks have family photos and a dog collage tacked up; one explorer was halfway through reading A Broken Promise. Wilson’s taxidermied penguin is still sprawls on his desk, alongside scientific vials and odd colored liquids labeled Invicta Touching Medium and Sublimed Pyrogallic Acid. The entire space feels perfectly frozen in time, down to the socks hanging to dry above the stove. As my friend Anne said, you feel that at any moment the door could burst open and the lost expedition could walk back in, stomping boots and shaking off snow.
I mean, these two.
As a little girl I was obsessed with penguins: the penguin toy I won from the Avon Lake library for reading the most books, the penguin song I roller skated to, the penguin photos cut from National Geographic and pasted to my bedroom walls. Yesterday I took a two hour snowmobile journey out to Cape Royds to finally say hello to tens of thousands of penguins in the wild.
We had a surprise welcoming committee waiting to greet us: a pod of 8-10 orca whales jumping and arcing right at the edge where the ice meets the open ocean. I’m not the world’s greatest nature photographer - I kept gasping or screaming every time the whales would leap up, and accidentally photographing the sky - but you can see the orca in the top photo on the right, and notice how close the whale is to the penguins, not to mention close to us. I also love the little penguin footprints everywhere, and the beautiful volcanoes and mountain ridges covered in snow in the background.
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